January 31, 2010

Sunday, a day of rest....HA!

Every Sunday, I think it will be different.

Every Sunday, I think, they know the drill. Today they'll be so good.

Every Sunday, I'm wrong.

Sure some Sundays are better than others.  But lately, eh, not so much.

Joseph has a VERY hard time with transition. So the transition from his nursery class to his primary class has been, well, less than ideal.

It never ceases to amaze me just how long a screaming child can hold out! I find crying to be exhausting. How do they manage to survive the day after a temper tantrum that rivals a hurricane?

Well, needless to say his screaming was very distracting. I took him out of class, down the hall, and to the breezeway between the outer and inner church doors. And I let him scream it out. For a very. long. time.

During that time a number of elderly men and women passed through those doors. Not a single one passed without smiling or chuckling and commenting on their days of been there's and done that's. Some told stories, some offered advise.

One lady offered the following story:

When one of my girls was about 2 years old, she would NOT stay in her bed. She would just keep coming out all night long. Finally, one night, I grabbed her but the front neck of her sleeper and hauled her off her feet. Somehow, her head managed to collide with my nose. I broke my own nose.

Okay... never grab a child by their pajamas and bring them up to my face. Check.

I felt grateful that none of them looked at me like I was an evil parent, or a bad mother. They all seemed to understand.

Finally, Joseph calmed down. We gave each other hugs and exchanged I love you's. I took him back to class where I sat with his for a while. He was perfectly calm but he snuggled up to me. After a few minitues, he seemed to be okay so I left.

I watched him though the little window on the door for another minute. He face was expressionless, his cheeks we bright red.

And. I. Felt. Like. Crap.  (pardon my language)

I love that kid but man alive, he can sure be stubborn!

After church wasn't another better. The boys were at it all day. The girls weren't much better.

I've decided to blame it on the snow.

Being a parent is one of the most rewarding and the most doggone stinking hard thing I've ever done.

So tonight, I'm going to chant to myself as I fall asleep, "I'm not a bad mom, I'm not a bad mom." So tomorrow I'll believe it and start over.


12 super cool people speak:

Stacy said...

You are not a bad mom!

Church with kids is just plain hard. That's that. Each week I think we'll avoid the Armageddon that was the week before, but as the baby gets older, it just seems to get worse. I also think that once Max gets in nursery, everything will get better, then realize I'm kidding myself because the chances that he'll actually go to nursery are slim to none!

Anyway, I keep trying to remember that these days are hard, but my kids aren't getting any younger. It won't always be like this, and we may miss it when it's gone. I won't, however, miss the thrown cheerios in sacrament meeting, or the girls wrestling in their dressed during the opening hymn.

hjsmith said...

wow sure sounds like how my last couple of day have gone and of course every Sunday especially as a temporary single parent. Today was no exception....screaming to get ready, to get to the car, on the way to church, at church, on the way home from church, and even while trying to get thenm all to bed...by the time all is said and done I too curl up and chant to myself....and tonight is definately one of those nights....and I do know wha tit feels like to feel like the worlds worst mom...then the sun shines a little when out of no where you get a picture of you and it says mom I love you(: ah(: the sun through the creaming tornados of raising strong willed children. I pray all the time I dont mess them up on this road together.
I know you are doing a great job. and if all else fails eat chocolate right(: I hope tomorrow you will see the sun and feel better(: you are not alone girl(:
If this helps think of Seth and Emma having a fist fight during sacrament meeting and me holding the twins trying to break it up with Adam sitting content in the corner drawing a picture in his book(: Yeah the joys(: love ys girl(:

the Gardners said...

lol. Too funny! I think you would be a bad mom if you didn't have experiences like this. Just think what growth you would be missing out on! He he he. Tyrus doesn't like to go to Sunbeams either. He wants to go back to Nursery. I can't tell you how many times I have to kick off my sandals (I only own the one pair of church shoes and he knows he can beat me if I have them on) and chase after him after I drop him off at primary! Both kids seem to do much better if Dad drops them off, instead of me. They get all whiney and clingy when I take them. Also, today they had to come and get us to come to his class. He had his shirt of...well, just his arms out of his shirt and his shirt over his head, since he couldn't undo the buttons. They couldn't get him to put the shirt back on and all the other kids were starting to take their shirts off! Bless those Sunbeam Teachers! And Serene, this is the joy of taking kids to church. It's entertaining for others! =) One day it will be our turn to giggle at some other family!

Heidi said...

One thing our guest speakers in the branch ALWAYS comment on is how reverent (read: quiet) the sacrament portion of our meeting is. Really I think they're being vague in expressing how extremely grateful they are that they got one hour away from their squirmy, screaming, crying kids. But they can't be honest about that in our branch, or who would want to get married then?! :-)

Well, it hasn't deterred me a bit and I still anxiously await my chance with the challenge!

Courtney said...

The fact that you stay calm through all that is amazing to me, you have a lot of patience. Sean's grandparents would take them out to the car and make them sit in there until they calmed down. To me it seems like a reward for being bad, but who knows, it might just work. Good luck!

wonder woman said...

For the last 4 months of last year, my 3 yo couldn't wait to go to Primary. He hated nursery. About that time they divided jr and sr nursery, so his nursery was much more like a class, and he liked it. I thought he was going to have no problem going to Primary.

But now that he's going...oh my. He wants to sit by his brother and throws a fit if he doesn't. And yesterday, he wanted to stay with me the whole time. It always happens this way -- if I'm the one who drops him off, he has a hard time. If Superman drops him off, he's fine. Yesterday I subbed for the chorister, and he had a hard time. He sat in the back of Primary room for 15 minutes during sr primary because he wanted to be with me and not go to class. After sitting quietly for 15 minutes, I asked if he wanted to go color and have a snack with his class. He said yes. Ended up having a great time.

But he can be so stubborn! I'm honestly really struggling with him right now. He continues to pee his pants 3 times a day. And has become REALLY violent. Anyway.....maybe I should do a post of my own about it.

Serene, you're not a bad mom. You're a great mom. And things will get easier....eventually. :o)

E said...

I love it!! Isaac is our first to HATE nursery. He screams and screams and I feel so terrible--mostly for the leaders but partly for him. BTW--there is a little story in the ensign thsi month that TOTALLY made me think of you--I double checked the author twice--even though I know your two oldest are girls...Feb Ensign page pg 68 and 69. I couldn't help but smile!

Valerie said...

Sundays are not easy for me either. Sabrina, my 7 year old, is old enough to not give me problems, but she always seems to find something to SCREAM about before we leave for church. (Breakfast, her dress she chose the night before is too tight or too short or too scratchy, or she doesn't want me to do her hair...) I have to try VERY hard not to lose it and scare the spirit away before we go to church. Although, once we're there, she's usually okay. Hope your little one starts to like primary soon!!!

Serene is my name, not my life! said...

I so appreciate everyone's comments!! I feel like this is a support group! LOL!
Some of you mentioned that its better when your husbands drop off your kids. Well, Luke is a little softer than I am. They'd RATHER have daddy take them because they have a better chance at getting their way!

Stacy: "the Armageddon". Haha, that's a good way to describe it!

Holly: I can't imagine what you have to go through every Sunday by yourself with all the kids!! We have a hard enough time with just the two of us!!

Michelle: I laughed so hard when you said that all the other kids were taking of their shirts. I would have love to see that!

Heidi: i think you're right! And I think you'll be a great mom someday.

Courtney: Luke usually takes them out to the car and buckles them in. They hate it. SO it usually works. But it was snowing and I didn't have the car keys so I didn't do it.

WW: Oh man, I know! I only hope its a phase because Joseph (3 year old) is like that too! Being violent and what-naught. I really struggle with him. Maybe it's second child/boy syndrome.

E: I seriously laughed. Are you referring to the lady at the grocery store? I just read that last night. I thought, "good for her" as well as, " hmm, her kids are spaced a little further than mine." LOL!

Valerie: Its always nice to hear from a more experienced mother. It gives me hope that i can survive these days! =)

Kate and Cole said...

I love when I passed you in the hallway wit Joseph and he was telling you what he wanted and you said so sweetly "well, I don't care what you want..." I had to laugh. We've all been there. Everyweek.

Emily C said...

I second what Kate said. We've all been there. Every stinking week.

My boys are pretty good, but sacrament meeting when Josh is gone or on the stand just plain stinks. And Leo's 14 months, meaning I'll be tuning church meetings out for the next 16 weeks.

Just last week, I was dragging Guy up off the floor, and cracked his poor head on the bench. I felt bad, but was so relieved when he wanted to cuddle in my lap for the last few minutes of sacrament.

Sometimes I fantasize about having 3 separate meetings every week, until I remember that it would mean getting the kids ready to go and in the car 3 times instead of 1.

Heidi said...

Well, I have my devil's advocate part when it comes to thoroughness and statistics, but I saw this link, laughed, and thought of you (and many other mothers). http://news.byu.edu/archive10-Jan-raisingkids.aspx
But I'm tending to think it's right, because wouldn't the Lord bless those who have been keeping His commandment?

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