February 21, 2011

WARNING: Thoughtful Post Ahead

You've been warned.

Have you ever yelled at your children, only to have them yell back? Then you give them the evil stinky eye and say, "Don't you yell at me!"

Or perhaps you've jumped all over them for having a messy room and demand that they pick it up this instant! Only to realize your own bedroom looks like a bomb went off in it?

*...awkward silence...*

Whew! *nervous laugh* Me either! *clearing throat... cough* Pish, don't know what you're talking about. Heh...

But if I did kind of, sort of, know what that was just maybe like, which I don't of course, *cough* eh hem.... I may just feel guilty when I do it.

Here's the thing.

I teach the 12-13 year old girls at church in the Young Women's program, and it's great! But the last two lessons have really latched onto my conscious and they refuse to let go, forcing me to re-evaluate lot of things.

Nuts... oh I mean, fabulous!

Last weeks lesson was titled, "Creating a Spiritual Environment in the Home". 

The two main points the lesson covered was the actual physical environment in which we discussed how important it was to keep slothfulness and uncleanliness far from you.

Great, just great.

And the other main point covered the attitudes of the home occupants and how one person's attitude can have a huge effect on the mood of others in the home.

 Busted.

I'm the mother after all. And the all too popular saying about, "If mom's not happy, no one is happy!" is so true.

No pressure. (I suddenly realize why I'm a chocoholic)

Now, I'm pregnant. But I'm not the glowy pregnant women type. No no, I don't glow. I growl. A lot.

Messes and fights are just a little harder to deal with and I can often fly off into a tizzy over seemingly ridiculous things.

I refuse to give you an example. Gotta maintain some sense of dignity you know.

So, in the lesson there was story about a girl who decided to change her attitude and everyday pretended to be cheerful, until it became a habit as well as her real attitude.

I can do that, right? Pretend to be cheerful on the days when duct taping certain little people who-will-not-be-named together seems like a perfectly wonderful idea?

I bet that would make a big difference in a lot of situations.

Now, yesterday's lesson was called, "A Woman's Responsibility to Teach". The basic point of the lesson was that we are always teaching, whether we realize it or not.

Our words, attitudes, actions, and examples are all having an effect on someone at all times.

As a mother, it is my children who are affected the most by every word, action, and attitude.

Again, no pressure. It's cake! (burnt to ash cake anyway)

So yes, I have been re-evaluating many things, setting new goals, etc. Perfection isn't the goal here, just going to try a little harder to be a little better.

Course, if life changing lessons like this keeps happening, I may have to go on vacation to recover from all this spiritual surgery.

If I I'm going to start being a better example for my children, I guess I better stop telling them they aren't allowed to eat candy for breakfast, then sneak chocolate into the shower so I don't have to share.

Well, maybe. I'll think on that one for a bit.

Speaking if chocolate.....


What are some of your thoughts? I'd love to know!

14 super cool people speak:

Jocelyn Christensen said...

Uh yeah, that's why when my daughter asked for a cookie before breakfastthismorning,I said "yes,but please eat at the table"...don't want to be a hypocrite ya know! :)

T said...

I have had a lot of "do as I say not as I do" moments this week...

like sneaking onto my computer to check blogs when I've told them that no electronic devices are allowed until the house is clean...

so what did I do? I cleaned my room. and I AM doing better at keeping my voice in check...

but it's daily work - gotta keep pretending to be that chipper cheery chick until I die I guess. Or at least until they all move out and I can blame my attitude on age.

The Martos Fudge said...

Oh darn... We also had those lessons... But I did not get all this from it. THANKS... Now I have to re-evaluate a little on this end. Thanks, thank you. Thats just great. I was doing just fine, yelling and eating chocolate, and making my kids clean. NOW... I have to feel bad about it.

Garden of Egan said...

I seriously do not know what is wrong with eating chocolate in the shower.
Seriously.

Good post. Nice reflections.
And you my friend....
are wonderful.

Sarah said...

The chocolate in the shower makes me laugh:) I haven't tried that one yet:)

I have no sage words of wisdom. I am battling the SAME EXACT thing over here.

Want to come over and play and we'll "plan" how we can be better Mommies:) (i.e chocolate, cookie dough, etc.)


Love you Serene:)

Cheeseboy said...

I've really got to go clean my room now.

So much truth to what you said. For dads too. But if one thing is for certain it's that no one's happy unless the mother's happy.

Lara said...

Sigh.

I kind of wish I didn't read this. But I guess I'm glad I did.

Pierced the heart, I tell you. I've really been struggling this winter and I need to change. Me. Not everyone else in my household like I often lead everyone to believe!

Stef said...

Ain't motherhood MAWvelous!!
It is. Really. I could never have become the strong person that I am if I weren't a mother. Then again, I wouldn't have lost half my mind in vomit, blow outs and and crayon/marker on the walls either.
You have given me a lot to think about. Thanks!

ldsjaneite said...

Teaching that age of girls was my favorite calling, because not only did I love them so much but I also got so much out of teaching the lessons! Amazing how much more I got out of those things the 2nd time through. :-) Wonderful insifhts--good luck!

(And it is National Chocolate Lovers' Month, so I wouldn't worry too much about it, yet.)

Wonder Woman said...

I don't have any more advice than what you've already shared, but I do know it's harder than it looks. Also know that you're doing better than you think you are. (And that's from Sis. Beck, so you KNOW it's true.)

And one thing that's a sure-fire pick me up for myself is music. Doesn't have to be churchy to create a happy atmosphere in the home.

p.s. LOVE your header.

Sue said...

I think you are right on. So right on, in fact, that there isn't much more to add.

Other than to remember that you need to be gentle with yourself when you're trying hard to be better. Cause it isn't easy...not for any of us!

Hugs.

=)

Patty Ann said...

Yep, Michael McLean has a song about being gentle with yourself. Remember that we are all here learning to be better!! It is so not easy to not yell, I think it was harder when the kids were little, and it was harder when my life was full of stress. Just give yourself permission to lose it once in awhile and when you do, send yourself into time out in your room. After all, it really helps to have some quiet time, (and maybe eat a chocolate or two in peace!)

Garvin Smith said...

I love you Scupper!
pappy

Valerie said...

Being a mom is sooo not easy and there is always a long list of things to improve no matter how hard we try. I think as long as we love our children and stay close to our Father in Heaven, we can take care of the most important things and be heading in the right direction and somehow our kids live through it. :)

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