Sorry I skipped the Recipe Round-up this week. All truth be told, I didn't get around to grocery shopping until Thursday night, and after that goofy vlog I did on Friday in which I said, and I quote, "I hope we have a good weekend too, and no one ends up puking like they did last weekend..."
Ya, guess who was reacquainting their face with the toilet a few hours later? Huuhh? That right, MWAH!
It was so.... not awesome. My stomach muscles still hurt from that. Then all day Saturday I was super nauseous and light-headed. At least Hubby was rather grand and delicious, and cleaned the house for me. At least by yesterday I was feeling all better.
Then I discovered that my dinner list is lost. Blast it all.
I promise we'll do it next week though!
I took all five children with me to the dentist last Thursday since the three older kids and myself all had appointments.
My children weirdly love going to the dentist. They get to watch TV on the ceiling and pick out prizes. Fixing cavities and needle pricks are apparently a small price to pay for such delights... er, something.
We always have the same hygienists work on us so obviously over the past couple years they have come to know us rather well, even though we only go in every six months.
The hygienist who always cleans my teeth is this really sweet, young mommy of two. She just had her second baby a few months ago.
Every time we go in she peppers me with questions about how many more kids I want, how closely my kids are spaced, was it all planned, how do I deal with this situation or other, how do I feel about this or that, what are my outlets to all the craziness, how do I rejuvenate as an individual, etc. I do my best to answer her questions without drooling or spitting on her, or biting her fingers off while they are in my mouth.
Because that would be awkward.
When we finished up this last time, she smiled and said, "I just love talking to moms like you who aren't afraid to admit they love being a mom or to have lots of kids. It really inspires me."
For some reason this made me pause. I don't know exactly why it stuck with me so, but in truth I never really considered that having children, or loving them and actually wanting to be home with them, would be something someone would consider "inspiring". It both uplifted and saddened me.
In truth I don't care how many children someone decides to have. (outside of certain bad or terrible circumstances of course) It's not my place to pass judgement. Since I can never truly understand someones upbringing, personality, desires, needs, or capabilities, nor will I know all the good or bad things that have happened in their life that have shaped them into who they are, why would it ever be my place to judge someone who has one child or eight?
I've seen the judgement passed both ways. Some on those who have no or few children, and some who have a crazy amount. But I've known people who have struggled for years on end and spent oodles of money to get that one or two children, just like I know people who have become pregnant while using two or three forms of birth control.
I can still quite distinctly remember my "oops... surprise!" pregnancy with Jacob. My third baby in less than three years, the disapproving glares, the snide remarks, and the questioning of my intelligence was all a little too much for me at the time. It got to the point where I was actually quite embarrassed to go out in public because I dreaded the reactions.
Now, that I am a older and hopefully a bit wiser and tougher, I only feel sadness for those people who belittled me. They did not understand the situation, they did not know me, they did not know how tough it was for me. They simply... judged me.
By the time we were all done at the dentist, it had been two and a half hours. HOURS!
Do you know what happens to a group of toddlers after they have been trying so hard to be good for HOURS in a small space?
Ya... they start to not be so good anymore. In the last half hour before we left, I had stopped Alayna from jumping on the puzzles, broke up four fights, told the kids to stop running and screaming through the doors, and to not bother anyone with a stinking touch phone by asking if they have any games on them! Gah!
As I trudged out the door, dragging my by now loud and whinny children behind me, who also happen to be starving since it was almost 6pm and they hadn't eaten since lunch, I could feel the judgmental stares boring into my back.
And I confess, in the moment, I felt quite embarrassed.
If only those people knew how good the kids had been for the first two whole hours we had been there. And instead of passing judgement, they could have just... held the door open for us.
What that little hygenist doesn't know, is that she too inspired me. She simply saw the good. And sometimes, that's all we should do.
I hope I too will always pause before passing judgement and remember that most of us are simply doing the best we know how.