August 1, 2012
When I started blogging, about four and a half years ago, I didn't have the slightest clue as to what I was doing. If you've ever wondered why my blog URL says "Serene Designs" it is because I had originally intended this to be an artsy blog. As it says in my little profile spiel, I studied visual arts and have always enjoyed creating things with my hands.
So, my friend Michelle helped me figure out how to set this blog up and THIS was the first blog post I ever wrote.
I laugh at it now because it seems strange to remember how much I hated writing back then. I never could keep up a dang journal and even though my college professors would comment on how well written my papers were, or even those blastedly annoying "journal entries" that some teachers required, I had always chalked it up to the fact that I would have my dad review my papers who would then offer advise for tweaking or grammar.
I still don't think I'm much of a "writer" but I confess that I have come to enjoy it very much.
Back at the beginning, after I had written a couple posts showing some of my art projects, I spent a lot of time talking with Michelle who offered the advise that people like to read personal stories, stuff about you and/or your family. So I wrote a couple of those, but it wasn't until I wrote my first kid mess story called, "Don't Cry Over Spilled Milk", that I realized how fun it was to write something that made people laugh. Reading it now I don't think it's particularly well-written, but I enjoyed reading the comments so much that I couldn't stop writing the stories.
Not long after that, I wrote my first reflective post called... well, "Reflections", (I always was one to be original) expressing some of those overwhelming motherhood thoughts and feelings that often accompany this parenthood gig. Again, the comments were inspiring to me because it seemed as though there was this invisible support group out there just waiting to cheer you on.... all six of them.
For years blogging has been a passion of mine. Once I started branching out and "guest posting" people actually started reading! I found it supremely fulfilling and vastly entertaining. I made several grand "blogging buddies" many of whom no longer blog, but a few have continued on to become what I consider rather famous bloggers. But for a while I was on a huge high, blogging about anything and everything, feeling inspired to write about all the craziness motherhood tends to bring, in ways that would make people laugh and relate. I would literally stay up all night editing photos or catching up on blogging to ensure I would have a post out almost every day.
During this time I would often read about how people experience what they call "blog burnout" but I couldn't see how such a thing was possible.
But after a strong three-year blogging streak and having five kids in six-and-a-half years, I could finally appreciate what they meant by that term.
I don't really feel super inspired or driven anymore, in fact, I often feel as though my blog is no good and should give it up. But then one of you super amazing readers has to go and be all nice to me and say how much you enjoy my blog, so I push on, hoping that one of these days I will snap out of this blogging funk and make it decent once again.
It's true that I rarely read blogs anymore, with all the kids home the time just isn't there. Nor do I respond to comments very often. But I do read every single one, even look up your blogs and profiles from time to time. I feel bad that I can't give a more personal response to the few people who still comment, but I do read them, sometimes I laugh or smile, sometimes I realize something I had written was misunderstood and go back to re-write a piece of my post.
The worst is when, after publishing a post, even though I had proof read it 68 times before publishing, re-reading it again a couple hours or days later only to stumble upon 28,734,569 typos!
It's down-right mortifying! How do you stand me?
But as I've confessed to you before, I'm only perfect every other Wednesday, so my blog doesn't offer much hope in that arena.
I sometimes wonder how some bloggers out there find the time to keep up with it ever so diligently. I used to think I always would.
I don't mean to imply that I am any busier than anyone else. After all, we all have the same amount of hours in a day whether we have one child or five, whether you work or are a stay-at-home mom. But I think prioritizes have shifted a bit for me, all while I've been fighting a temporary burn-out.
In truth I don't really know what has spurred the creation of this post, only that for the first time in a while, I really just wanted... to write.
There is a famous quote by François de la Rochefoucauld that says, "The only thing constant in life is change".
I imagine once school starts again I'll have more time to blog, but not nearly as much interesting material. I am not one of those moms who can't wait for school to start again so my kids will leave, I rather enjoy having them all home. But I think they are ready for some structure and a change in pace.
Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you to all you readers out there for inspiring me with your comments, your emails, your questions, and your honesty. So far, it's been a grand ride.