April 27, 2012

Showering is Dangerous

I finished my morning shower and got dressed. Twisting my wet hair up into a towel and securing it on top of my head I stepped out into the kitchen and froze, my jaw dropping open.

The towel may have unceremoniously dropped to the floor too, but I can't be sure. All I could see before me was a wide and vast sea of mess.

The paper drawer had been emptied, coating the floor in paper, scraps, and coloring books. On top of the papers and heavily sprinkled about lay waves and waves of markers, crayons, and yarn, all pulled from the kids art drawer.

A bag of bread was cast off into one corner, leaving a trail of half eaten pieces in it's wake. Baby snacks were crushed and strewn across the paper coated floor.

The small bib drawer was pulled open and the little cloth protectors were dangling and dripping from it. Hiding her face behind the open drawer stood a three-year old girl who had about six bibs attached around her neck.

Across the room the drawer that held things like sandwich bags and aluminum foil also lay wide open and half its contents sat on the floor beneath it. The cup and tupperware drawer had also been ravished and relieved of their contents.

In yet another corner my cook books and recipe cards had been dumped out, and in the middle sat one very happy almost one-year old.

The almost five-year old lay one top of the counter munching away at a piece of bread as though he were king of the world.

I took in the scene, then reminded myself to breathe.

Then I ....    *beeeeeeep* We're sorry, this program is temporarily out of service. It would appear a power surge temporarily shorted the circuits. Please wait while we fix the connection.*beeeeeeeeep* ....

Needless to say, it didn't take long for those kids to have it whipped back into shape.

The only thing is, I was so stunned I actually forgot to take a picture! And it takes a lot to shock me.

*hanging my head*

I'm losing my bloggy touch people.  I feel so ashamed.

Still, if anyone were to ask me what the heck I do all day, I may just take to strangling them.

Lovingly... of course.

7 super cool people speak:

Mama Smith said...

...."once upon a time" there was this little dark-eyed girl...whose "busy-ness"...could MATCH...the "busy-ness" of her very own little ones...Do you wish to GUESS who this little dark-eyed little girl was? Hmmmm.....(smile)

balloongal said...

Oh, it is too bad you didn't get a picture. But at least you wrote about the scene so you have a written record of it.

The Bagley Family said...

Charlie once got a cauking gun and used it on the floor, his bed and between his toes, he was supposed to be in bed but started screaming wqhen it was hardening around his toes...and that stuff is STILL on his blankets ans crpets, i could never get it out....4 years later. I feel for you.

Shaylee Ann said...

{hug} Ohhh, Serene, I seriously wish I lived close to you so that I could come help you clean up the mess! I feel for you! I haven't had my own kids yet, but being the oldest of nine, I've seen my fair share of messes - or created my own {guilty look}. From books scattered all over bedrooms, to bath time floods, to the twins using their heater vent as a toilet. . . . Yeah, I feel for you. :)
And I cracked up when I reached your "technical difficulty". X)

Love ya!

Shaylee Ann

P.S. I would love it if you checked out my latest post. We're adopting, and we need all the help we can get! I don't have a donation account set up just yet, but I just want to put it out there. Thanks! :)

Sue said...

Ahhhh, the joys of motherhood.

Thanks for reminding me that the empty nest is better than I thought...


Carolina Nightingale said...

Most Honest Mommy Blog Ever. Good on you, because all the "and then I sat down and laughed and drew with them for an hour and they produced artworks later bought by dealers for auction and then I documented it for pinterest" Mommyblogs are full of crud. We all know better. Reading real is funnier, smarter, more interesting, less photogenic but way more fun, and less likely to cause blips in other mommies reading your blog:-) Thanks for being REAL, and not fake, because THAT's what blesses your kids most as well!! (and oh my goodness, do I not absolutely get that exact same service announcement around my house. I'm not sure everybody else can hear it, but they sure do move fast when I hear it...) love-Tamar

Royalbird said...

I wrote once about how hard it was to take a shower because of this very thing and so I usually try to squeeze in showers before my husband leaves for work. The responses I got were why I don't bring the kids into the shower with me? Yeah, three kids in the shower with me. I. don't. think. so. And today, I didn't even bother showering. I didn't get it done before the husband left and I decided on an impromptu zoo trip and didn't have time. As long as I get one every few days, that's fine, right?

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