May 17, 2010

Drama Queen

"Mommy, what if no one wants to marry me? What if no one loves me or thinks I'm pretty and then doesn't want to marry me?"

Such is the manner of a typical, concerned conversation with my oldest offspring. She brings it up often. 

Daddy is always sure to step in and tell her that he'll always love her and no one will ever love her more than he does.

And the gazing into anything that reflects, while speaking to herself are all fairly normal for a girl, I think. I try not to let it play tricks with my mind as I remember as a young girl wanting to be beautiful.

That's normal, er... right? Right?


But don't let her calm exterior fool you. Beneath it all is the queen of all that is dramatic. The peace of our lives is often shattered by the crying of this fair maiden because we looked at her wrong.

Or we threw away a scrap of paper that was apparently held sacred.

Or one of the boys touched her shoe.

Or she didn't get the last yogurt.


Or the baby dragged "her" blanket out of "her" room. 

I guess she hasn't quite figured out that since the girls are sharing a room, it is now the property of both of them.

Little did I realize that these were the calm days. The days of peace and tranquility. 

These were the days before...


the very first lost front tooth.

Oh the drama that has ensued since! The never ending stream of heartfelt cries that involve the most hideous of words!

It started out calm enough though. When it was first lost, she would approach me often and somewhat sorrowful and ask, "Mom, am I still pretty?"

"Of course you are!" I would reply vehemently. "Why wouldn't you be?"

"Because my tooth is gone, now I look silly."

And no matter how many times I would give a lengthy speech about why one silly tooth did nothing to mar her cuteness, all has been in vain.

Now when she get upset, she comes out with, "Fine! I'm not pretty, I'm ugly!!" And off she'll storm.

In fact, accusing herself of being ugly now that her tooth is gone is her new favorite way of letting us know how unhappy she is with any given situation.

Can I just say, I'm not equipped for this?


Heaven help me.

34 super cool people speak:

Kristine said...

Sounds just like my girls, so at least you know she's normal :)

Or maybe it's me that should be relieved to know that my girls are normal. lol

gigi said...

Yeah, girls are little drama queens alright! I had two boys but now have two GRAND~daughters and believe me things are way different!! Hang in there, one day she'll be a mother too.
Happy Monday!

Sue said...

The irony being that she IS so pretty...

Girls are strange creatures.

=)

Garden of Egan said...

Oh baby you are in for a wild ride!

Ya, she's normal.

Whatever that is.

Oh by the way.....she's beautiful.

You know with you AND two girls in the house....I feel sorry for your hubs. Ya, I had two girls AND me....and well, let's just say the hormones ruled the house. No wonder my hubby has gray hair. No, not from me, he had 5 sisters.

Lisa said...

Drama Queens- I have one in my house too. Mine mellowed out some the older she got.

Lisa said...

I think the rule is mothers are never equipped, until they're in the midst of it. Then it's sink or swim. I choose to swim~in a polka dot red suit. Good luck with this. :)

Jocelyn Christensen said...

Things for me to look forward to, I guess...sigh...

whitney said...

Serene. Thanks for the add on MMB. Your blog is absolutely adorable.
Following!!

ldsjaneite said...

I don't know if I was concerned if I was pretty or not. But as I approached teen years, I was tired of the label "cute." I'd been the cute, chubby, ringletted, befrilled baby of the family for a decade, and I wanted no more. I've reached the longing to be pretty now, though.

It's funny to read this, but then sad, too. The adversary knows one of the biggest female weaknesses/hindrances--and look how early he's attacking them! But with the Mom (and Dad) she has, I know she is in great hands.

Scrappy Girl said...

Put on your big girl panties because you have the TEEN YEARS to look forward to...help!

Sarah loves it all said...

Sort of reminds me of myself. This sort of thing makes me want to continue having boys. The world/media is so tough on little girls. I was never as cute as she is at her age...please tell her that I said she really is a beautiful little thing. Ha ha- not that I'm anybody. :)

M-Cat said...

Every DAY, I thank Heavenly Father for not sending me girls to raise. I just don't have it in me.

Even with Sissy, we get easily exasperated at the dramatics that only girls seem to bring!

One Cluttered Brain said...

Yowza!~
Sounds like my girls....
*sigh*

the fowlers said...

the only comfort i can think of is this:

at least you have two rowdy boys to shake things up before you have to deal with another dramatic girl, right?

Amy said...

Tell her I think she looks like a Princess.

Wonder Woman said...

Savannah is the prettiest city in Georgia and your Savannah is the prettiest girl in Idaho. You can tell her I said so. And losing teeth means she closer to being a beautiful woman.

Even as I type this, I have mixed feelings. You want your daughter to think she's pretty, but not that it's all that matters.

Honestly, I don't think I was much of a drama queen. I wanted a daughter so badly because of the relationship I share with my mother. But now......I'm getting scared! :o)

Lindzena said...

"Mommy, what if no one wants to marry me? What if no one loves me or thinks I'm pretty and then doesn't want to marry me?"

STORY of my LIFE. And I'm almost 21! Your daughter sounds a lot like me. It's something difficult to grow out of; I was never totally secure until I went to college and started getting attention from the boys. I don't know if that is a comforting thought for you.

But in case she is in need of any support, she can take it from me, she is not only pretty, but adorable. It's only at the starting line, and I'm sure that it will all turn out wonderfully.

Anne said...

Oh boy, I'm in for it, aren't I? All the drama with girls... sounds like fun...
: )

Steve Finnell said...

you are invited to follow my blog

annie said...

I am so glad I only have two girls - 10 years apart! I will NEVER understand them. and of course I was NEVER like that!

MommyJ said...

My daughter once asked me what would happen if she grew up and fell in love with someone that didn't love her. She's only six! I was surprised she was already pondering rejection... she doesn't need to worry though. She's much too pretty to ever be rejected. Says her heavily biased mother.

Mayet said...

she's really cute! I guess all little girls pass this stage--oh!I have two girls- 2 1/2 years and 7 months old, I still have time to think of no nonsense answer for my girls in case they bombarded me with questions like that.
;-)stopping by from SITs

Braden said...

My daughter is very different--I think her greatest concern would be, "What if someone thinks I'm pretty someday and wants to marry me. Ewww. Gross." So I can't relate to the context, but oh believe me, is she a drama queen. So, you have my empathy there. Good luck.

The Martos Fudge said...

Oh I can't wait for my baby to become a drama queen. Oh wait I think we are already there. Your Daughter is so beautiful and looks like you all the way. LUCKY I wish my kids had something of me.

Pearl said...

Good luck! I have a drama queen too. She is second oldest, but more dramatic than the whole family put together. Crying because her sock has a wrinkle in it, or because the cat doesn't want to sleep on her bed. "No one likes me!" she tells us all daily.
Now just make sure you share some of that luck, I'm gonna need some too!

Saimi said...

Wow! Sounds like the drama we have in peschool. I just wrote a post called Sugar and spice and everything...nice on my Three days a week blog.

That's as close as I come dealing with girls.

Good luck, I have no advice...But to hang in there! She is beautiful!

The Kooky Queen--Rachel said...

Oh my golly that girl will have ZERO problems finding a man! YOU will have problems fighting them off! What a gorgeous girl!

Mr. Stupid said...

She is really cute. Even without the tooth. (Hey, they rhyme)
I had lost three at the same time when I was a kid... LOL

Mama Smith said...

Your BROTHERS had a favorite statement over the years..."We have PMS ALL YEAR LONG IN OUR HOUSE!!!" Wonder what ever gave them that IDEA...Do you think because there were "5" females in the home??? (smile)

iamwoman said...

I am just tripp'n at how many comments you get! I bet a party at your house with so many followers would be rock'n:)

I don't even know what comment I have for you, other than a virtual hug for the sorrow that will continue to entail:) Daughter=Drama. When you figure out how to get through your day without wanting to pick her up and MAKE her see reality as it is, can you let me know?

(((Hugs for now)))

Serene is my name, not my life! said...

LOL, thanks everyone! There is peace in knowing we are normal.

Sort of.

iamwoman said...

Oh wait....I forgot....I think I might actually have something enlightening to say and I think I wrote a post about it forever ago.

Your daughter is going to have these feelings of physical inadequacy because it's normal and unfortunately relates so much to the toxic world we live in. Although you can turn blue in the face trying to convince her of her beauty, there is another aspect as well... and that is to make sure that you know YOU are beautiful. As your daughter sees your self-confidence in yourself, no matter if there is a bad hair day, she will learn the right way to view herself. She will learn through your example. Although at this age you are going to get more drama than naught.. I remember feeling a particular longing a few years ago to NOT let that continue as she gets older, because I knew it would just get worse. I realized that although I was a pretty hot mama growing up, I had HORRIBLE self-esteem. I was told I was beautiful non-stop, so later on I had to wonder why I felt that way then? A lightbulb went on in my head one day and I realized it was because my mom always talked about her physical inadequacies. How could I believe what I was told by someone who criticized herself in the same breath? So, now try to never let me daughter hear me say negative comments about myself. She knows that I think "I" am beautiful, and that I think SHE is too. And I know it has and will make a difference.

So there you have it. Perhaps it's more long term than what you are dealing with in the moment, but it has really helped my perspective on the here and now moments:) Good gosh. Longest comment EVER. Sorry about that!

OH. And the daddy-daughter relationship is KEY. Girls listen to their daddy's:)

Brittney said...

she is so gorgeous...

But it does make me think too that Satan does start early. Scary thought. How do you tell them they're gorgeous on the one hand but then help them realize that outer beauty isn't everything?

See Mom Smile said...

Have the seen the show "Toddlers and Tiaras"? Your cutie is easy-peasy compared to those little fashionistas in the making.

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