(Disclaimer: the following post contains a lot of Mormon lingo. So if you don't understand a word of it, be sure to check out Mormon.org)
Our lives are run by the clock. Appointments, school, work, activities, the start and end of a day, are all measured by that big and little hand. Once you become a parent however, your life is dictated by another method commonly known as children.
Feedings, naps, bedtime, meals... these become the new time dictators. Everything from play group to doctor's appointments are scheduled around the kid's schedule.
So, when I called the Primary President to talk about the Trunk or Treat primary party we're doing tomorrow night, I took into account that her kids take their naps at about 12:30pm and since she is pregnant with her fifth child, she takes a nap at the same time they do.
So, I placed my phone call at noon. I was standing at the kitchen counter and while the phone was ringing, I grabbed a handful of Kix cereal that was sitting in front of me and without thinking, I popped it into my mouth just as K--- answered the phone. Oops.
She picks up the phone huffing and puffing while I'm trying to discreetly chew my extremely crunchy cereal without being too rude.
She's starts off by apologizing for the screaming going on in the background. No biggie. We start talking about the activity. I have to interrupt first as Jacob unloads a container of wipes into my lap. Suddenly, I hear a slight chuckle on the other end of the line as a whole new slew of crying starts up and K--- says to me, "Kyle thinks he's going to die." Then I hear, "Is the sword stuck in your pants?" More crying. "Well, do you want it in or out?" Suddenly, I burst out, "Yucky Jacob! Yucky!" K--- inquires as to what is going on and I have to tell her that Jacob is eating Savannah's molding clay.
We finish up our conversation and K--- says she should go finish getting lunch ready for her kids. But, we kept chatting a bit more and K--- asks me, "So, did Savannah enjoy being in the Primary Program yesterday?" Before I could answer, sudden screaming and crying breaks out anew and she says to one of her kids, "Oh I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Well, I better go! Okay, bye!"
As I hung up, I suddenly felt really guilty for calling her at noon when things were so crazy. I should have known it would be like that! Lunch before naps is just the way it works! I should have called her an hour or two earlier! Timing! Timing is everything!
I always feel so guilty when people call me and half the phone conversation is just me breaking up fights and halting disaster in its tracks.
I think most of the time, people are quite understanding and patient. But I know that it can be hard and upsetting for some moms to have their schedules interrupted. Me personally, I could care less! Unless, its nap time. I don't mean before or after, I mean right during naps. I have a motto, "Whosoever doth wake up the nappers, shall die!" Okay not really, but its sure does feel that way sometimes.
Today, while the boys were talking there naps, the doorbell rang. I was ready to pounce on whoever it was that rang the bell. I have a sign that says, "Nap time, please do not ring doorbell" which I had not put up over the button yet. Luckily, it did not wake up the boys. I opened the door and there were the two missionaries standing in front of me. They explained that they were just going door to door looking for someone to teach. By the way they were talking to me, I was guessing they knew we were LDS yet seemed uncertain of our activity level. This became apparent when one of the Elders asks, "So, do you go to church very often? I mean, do you go weekly, like, every Sunday? Because, I don't recognize you."
I suppressed my urge to laugh and pat the poor boy on his little 19-year old shoulders and explain that everything was going to be okay. I forgave him right then and there for ringing my doorbell during nap time.
Instead, I explained that I was in the Primary Presidency, which is why they probably don't see me around much, and my husband is a ward missionary, so yes, we go to church every Sunday. I just got the, "Ooh, okay." Gotta love the missionaries.
Perhaps I have nap issues I need to work on. If so, I probably inherited it from my dad. Growing up, when dad was asleep, you did not dare to disturb him unless you wanted to play games with your life! Okay, not really, but he was never happy about the interruption.
Am I the only one with issues?