October 1, 2008

Survival Tips

These are just a handful of survival tips I've learned in my limited experience as a wife and mother.

1. Never clean the floor before dinner.
2. Tell husband that if his socks are inside out or scrunched in a ball, they will not get washed.
3. Its okay to have a secret candy stash that even your husband doesn't know about.
4. Paper plates are a necessity to happiness.
5. Keeping the diaper pail outside greatly improves the smell of your house.
6. Never wear white or black. White shows hand prints, feet prints, and all other dirt smudges and food stains. Black shows all the snot that gets wiped on you, as well and any light colored food that gets stuck to you.
7. If you block the front door with all the garbage, leave a sticky note that lovingly says, "thanks for taking out the garbage for me", then lock the front door until it is done, statistics show husbands are much more likely to take out the garbage.
8. As the adult, crying is acceptable.
9. Speaking and smiling through clenched teeth during times of destruction, really helps with the crying rate in children.
10. Inform your husband early that in order to insure the survival and happiness of all family members, he is responsible for getting up with the kids at night.
11. Never look at a full length mirror while pregnant.
12. Look at baby pictures often; it helps you decide to keep them.


Last Year

If you have any survival tips to add, I'd love to hear them!

7 super cool people speak:

John and Jami West said...

This is the cutest post ever! I've never seen your kids as newborns. So sweet! My only survival tip is take a break when someone offers to give you one.

Dan & Melissa said...

Serene...you are so funny! I firmly agree with each of those survival tips! Thanks for the HELP!

Emily C said...

Amen to the full-length mirror while pregnant.

I swear my baby belly is segmented in strange ways.

Wendy said...

I would add: Ask for help or have a list of things that someone could do, so when someone asks for help, you can say yes!

kbandkids said...

Cute kids!! All those tips are great maybe I should implement a few. By the way do you check your email or do I have the wrong address.

Mama Smith said...

Survival Tip: When things are not going as smoothly as you would like...with your hubby...Have a JOURNAL on hand...Entitled: "Gratitude for my Eternal Companion" (or some other clever title)...and at the end of the day...write something nice in a form of gratitude for something your husband did that day...might have to stretch at times...but, there always is ONE redeeming ACT...that saves you from thoughts of being "SINGLE" again...(smile)

Nicole said...

My survival tip: Mandate family nap on Sunday afternoons. Oh, how I love Sundays :)

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